Making Time for Yourself

Does it seem like you can never find the time for yourself? Do you often wonder how people live a wholehearted and happy life? These are very common thoughts among people. As a woman, I feel like it is even harder to find time for yourself because we feel that we have so many shoes to fill on the way. We are busy trying to live a happy life all around. We want to be happy and positive while having a great career, balancing marriage and kids, and taking care of other outside duties. We often feel drained and like we do not have time for “extra curricular” things.

Ladies, there is SO much more we can do while still being able to manage our job and families. We can make time for us. We have to make sure that we are happy and living wholeheartedly inside, so everything and everyone that we come in contact with, can pick up those vibes too! As I often heard as a child, “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” This definitely began to be true seeing that if my mother was in a bad mood around us, we all were in a bad mood and “mean” to each other. If momma was happy, everyone was in a better mood and being a child, everything went in your favor. So, you want to make more time for yourself and want to reach a better state of happiness? There are many ways to go about this. This post will discuss several ways to make time for you in your busy life!

The first thing you have to acknowledge and admit is that you DO have time for YOU. Excuses are tools of the incompetent and monuments of nothing that build bridges to NOWHERE. We all have busy lives! You want to do something for you? You have to make the time to do so. As women, we often like to cater to others and we make sure that everyone and everything else is okay before we are overly concerned with ourselves. We have to realize that sometimes we have to be selfish. That is not always a bad thing. It is okay to be selfish when it comes to your happiness and health. So do not feel bad. Love yourself! People who truly care about you, will support you and not mind. Those who feel you are being selfish, need to reconsider their own selves! You work from 9am-5pm, get the kids home by 6pm, have dinner ready by 7:30pm, and get the kids ready for bed. I’m sure by this time, you may be drained but there are several times throughout the day that you can squeeze in things you want.

You want to workout, read, meditate, blog, you can do this before you go to work, during your lunch break or before you go to sleep. For example if your goal is to workout more, using the schedule above, you can wake up an extra 10 minutes to get a quick workout in. At work, take the steps if possible and walk around as much as you can. On your lunch break, walk around, eat smart, you might be able to get 10 minutes of a workout in also, something small and not too sweaty. After work and getting the household together, you can squeeze another 10 minutes in before you lay your head on that pillow. By doing something like this each day, you have worked out at least 30 minutes a day. It only takes 30 minutes of some form of exercise to get the job done. In some cases, you can do a high intensity workout for 10 minutes and you will feel great for the whole day! You do not need hours or the heaviest weights to be healthy and fit. For workouts, you are able to search the web for plenty of home and quick workouts that you can do. It’s 2015, I won’t hand all of the answers to you!

Find gaps in your days where you can make time for yourself. It might help to write your daily schedule down. Look for places that you do things that are not necessarily needed to be done, you just do them to pass time. Look for things that you “lolligag” while doing them. Those things, you can speed up the process to give you more time to do those things you TRULY want to do to focus on you. Writing things down definitely helps you visualize things better. There may be days where you just cannot find time for yourself, the kids might have soccer practice or there are weekly job meetings that you have to attend. That’s okay, do not try to over extend yourself to consolidate your days. Make a schedule. For example, 4 out of 7 days of the week, you give time to yourself. You can still reach your goals. Little progress is better than no progress.

Another thing to do, is to be OKAY with saying no. Sometimes friends may call and want to go out for lunch or coffee. If you know you are not really feeling like getting out of the house or you are wanting time alone, it is okay to turn down the invitation and tell them another time. Do not feel like you ALWAYS have to accommodate others. If you are anything like me, I usually do not know quite what I want to do. Sometimes I want to be around others and other times, I want to be by myself. In these cases, usually I just stay to myself. I figure that if I do not have the urge to go out with others, I really do not want to go. Spending time alone allows me to be productive. I can be productive by getting work done, cleaning, working on projects, checking things off my to-do list, and even napping! Just spending time with myself, is showing me great loving attention.

Some may think this is weird but go do something by yourself! I occasionally will treat myself to the movies or dinner, I might go run errands by myself or leisurely walk around the mall. Just the simple act of being by yourself feels “freeing.” You are leaving behind your worries and stresses at home. You are having anyone tag along with you and can have time to think and feel how you want to feel without interruptions. You can smile and be happy and goofy for no reason. You do not have to wait for anyone or answer to anyone while you have that time to yourself. Trust me, you won’t look weird. People WILL NOT be looking at you like you are a lonely individual. Treating yourself out to somewhere alone is a great feeling. It is very relaxing and it lifts a weight off your shoulder. I would use the word “exhilarating.”

The last strategy I will point out is to take a vacation for yourself. Go do something you like or enjoy doing. When I use the word “vacation,” this does not have to be anything expensive and extravagant. You can go visit family members who live some distance away from you. Spend the weekend with them as their house guest and enjoy their camaraderie. If you are feeling fancy, you can book a trip somewhere to just relax on your own. You can lay out on the beach, hit the slopes, or create a spa package for the whole day or weekend. Sometimes, all we need is a change of scenery to ignite that spark and give us that push again.

I hope some of these ways helped you figure out how to make time for yourself. It is very important to focus on yourself at times and to keep yourself healthy, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically. Remember, it’s okay to say no and it is okay to want to be alone at times. Just make sure you continue to ALWAYS move forward! Repeat after me, “There IS time for me!”

Bryn C.

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